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What's the difference between Abu Dhabi and Dubai?

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They don’t like the Flintstones in Dubai but in Abu Dhabi they Abu Dhabi do!

by JokesterBay
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General
A woman, upset that her husband came home late from golf again, decided to teach him a lesson. She left a note on the dresser that read: "I've had enough. I'm leaving you. Don't try to find me." Then she hid under the bed to watch his reaction. Soon, her husband came home. She heard him moving around, then he entered the bedroom, picked up the note, and read it. After a moment, he scribbled something on the paper and made a phone call. "She's finally gone. Yep, it's about time. I'm on my way now," he said happily. He grabbed his keys and left. Furious, the woman crawled out from under the bed, grabbed the note, and read what he had written:
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"I can see your feet. We're out of bread. Be back in five minutes."
by r/jokes
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If you see a Spanish person, tell them 'mucho.'
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It means a lot to them.
by JokesterBay
General
A young man goes into a drugstore to buy condoms. The pharmacist tells him they come in packs of 3, 9, or 12 and asks which he'd like. "Well," the young man says, "I've been seeing this girl for a while, and she's really hot. I think tonight's the night. We're having dinner with her parents, then we're going out afterward. I've got a feeling I'm gonna get lucky… and once she's had me, she'll want me all the time. Better give me the 12-pack." So he buys the condoms and leaves. Later that evening, he's sitting at dinner with the girl and her parents. He asks if he can say the blessing, and they agree. He starts praying… and keeps praying… and praying… for several minutes. Finally, the girl leans over and whispers, "You never told me you were such a religious person." He whispers back...
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"You never told me your father was a pharmacist."
by r/jokes