My 5 year old nephew came up to me with an outstretched hand…

Dad Jokes

My 5 year old nephew came up to me with an outstretched hand holding an acorn. "Uncle, what's this?" he asks. "That? That's a tree!" I replied "This is a tree?" he asks with a wrinkled look.

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"Yeah, in a nutshell!" I said.

by r/dadjokes

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I wanted to take my family on vacation. There was a sign that said 'Disneyland Left.'

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So we turned around and went home.

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I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.

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She looked surprised.

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How does a polygamist hippy count all his wives?

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One Mrs. Hippy, two Mrs. Hippy...